Silver Bullets

Sie Douglas-Fish

I'd like to watch you drown.

Digital illustration print


Digital illustration print

About a dead first love.

I’d been abandoned as a collage of my someone else. The pieces had never truly fit anyway, but I’d wanted them to.
I’d forced and glued them in place, maiming a form that never should have been.

Though some of your pieces have been replaced; the gaps filled much more comfortably, patched with a much gentler hand.
A hand that isn’t mine.

But the tiny ones are much harder. Parts of my mosaic filled too soon, too desperately by sugar glass that decayed, unlike what you promised.

Bits I will never claw out.

They come out in certain words, certain hobbies, and certain goals.


And I wonder if you still have any of my puzzle pieces.How much of it you’ve already managed to rewrite. If you were ever capable of any sentimentality.

I wonder if you have something forever tainted by my association as well. If you choke and recoil at my name and do a double take when you see someone with an ounce of my likeness in a crowd. And, if you do, if I should be sorry for you or sick with pride. I wonder if you are, in some way, still like me.

And I wonder if that kills you.

Sie Douglas-Fish | they/them | 100 Mile House, BC

Sie Douglas-Fish is a professional digital illustrator and designer raised in 100 Mile House, BC. Their art is a culmination of their experiences and reactions to the world around them, both a sponge and mirror of interests paired with a violent exploration of a vast array of human emotions. Much of their inspiration comes from irony, bright colours, pop and geek culture, as well as symbolism and mythological motifs to create narrative. Sie primarily uses semi-realistic, stylized rendering. In occupation, Sie is known for being able to adopt a variety of styles in character design, colouring, and occupational design, as well as layout and graphic design. Flow and energy is crucial to their work. Their art is a celebration, an apology, a scream of spite, and a love letter to who they were and who they are going to be. Sie’s art joined Acrylic Robotics on Dragon’s Den season 18.